Night Time

It's 3am and I am not asleep, not even tired. I've been awake since 8:30am yesterday. This recollection of time is nothing short of a habit.

I think night time is my best companion, I hardly ever have trouble embracing its presence by slumbering deep into its darkness. Many other times however, I never seem to find the need to seek its depth.

Here I am again, drowned by my own thoughts while reminiscing about everything possible. What can I say, I'm pretty sure that I have an addiction to this feeling. Why do I feel like this is déjà vu?

One day I'll stop all this thinking and start acting on some of these thoughts. One day I'll be able to figure out what's going on inside my own head.... One day I'll learn to like myself. One day I'll finally get it right. And I'll try till time catches up with me. One day I'll be too old to care.

The Great Dividing Range

Okay so it's 5am and I still can't sleep. Took some medicine but it's not working... I have always wanted to quote that line and now I can ;) but you don't want to know what the rest of the line is (not that they're relevant anyway). Wait, before you freak out, don't worry, I fell asleep today! I just randomly woke up at 5 and thought this was a good time to post.

Now to quote another MC song.
I've often wondered if there's ever been a perfect family. I've often longed for undividedness and sought stability.

The great dividing range. When you have two opposing sides forcing very different ideologies upon you, one on each side, I imagine that would be very healthy for a 20 year old, let alone 10. Unfortunately I am a little too educated to cave in to just one side so calibration is always required. When you need to do that on top of everything else in life, it gets a little tiring at times. Which is probably why I've never had the problem of sleeping before but perhaps now that I am away from all of that (for the most part), I have a little more energy to think.

As an engineer, there is a natural tendency to want to solve things. However, everywhere there is inconsistent data so I guess the step before that would be to redo measurements. Process in progress. Only time can verify but the question is, will it withstand the time needed for me to form my own judgement and come up with a solution?

Sun is up, maybe it's time to go back to sleep.

Quarter Life Crisis Continues

Is it just me or do you find classes that you're not taking more interesting than the classes you do take?

So during dinner tonight, somehow everyone ended up in my apartment and somehow we ended up discussing what we're going to do with our lives. It's kind of surprising to see how many people don't have a set path they want to take, but at the same time, I expected that result. Honestly speaking, how many people would actually know exactly what they want to do with the rest of their life before they're 30? It's not like school teaches us anything useful to help identify what we want either. Schooling is, for the most part, so useless.

Anyhow, I think I've settled on a vague plan about what I'm going to do with myself in the near future. Hopefully it goes according to plan but I am a firm believer in "don't make plans because nothing ever goes according to plan".

Now I would like to bore you with my obscure observations. I have noticed that my coathanger (technically it's Indako's since she was the one who bought them) in the bathroom has undergone creep due to the constant load that is Indako's beach towel on it over an extended period of time. I find that quite fascinating just because. And only the engineers would know what I'm rambling on about.

It is now time for me to go to bed since it's already 1:30am. More than 3 hours past my bedtime!