Anxiously Excited

It's the first day of school again tomorrow! Gosh, I just spent the past day cleaning out my room/s. I think I always have this mentality that I will eventually need a textbook, or a notebook, or some sort of worksheet, or a projet I did, or just general junk for nostalgia sometime in the future because every time I clean my room, I always pull out so much shit. Then there are cards, gifts, souvenirs that I decide to reorder and repack every time. I'm quickly running out of storage space.

So it'll be my 4th year starting in less than 10 hours! Excited? Yes because I cannot wait to graduate. It's not that I dislike learning, it's just that I dislike the way things get taught, the whole teaching environment. Also, I feel like I learn better by doing hands on stuff. Plus, I like getting paid.

I'm also extremely anxious because I've been hearing a lot about how many people have failed some sort of 3rd year engineering course. Also not helping with things is the fact that I've decided to take on 5 classes this semster. That is more than full time load and I've never tried that before. I guess it's time I try it before I graduate, huh? It'll definitely be interesting because I'm going in with a new work ethic after coming back from exchange. (Let's see how long this holds up.)

Another thing that's making me anxious is the fact that I really need to get a ton of networking done this year because I'll finally be needing that resource when I start job hunting at the end of the semester. This is a slightly daunting task for me since I'm not the social butterfly that you see dominating these networking events. In fact, I dread meeting new people. I must say going on exchange have trained me to be slightly better at this. Not having done vac work in my 3rd year might have also put me at a disadvantage although my academic advisor says I could have this work in my favour.

Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end.

Tomorrow is the beginning of my new school year and the end of my one year long holiday!

22.2

With Age Comes Wisdom

The irony of all of this is that I killed (not directly) 5 trees today (plus two baby birds).

Anyways, hope this new wisdom shows itself soon because I need some light. 

Wrong Flight

Lately it's been raining like crazy every single day. In fact, I can count on one hand the number of days it's not been raining since I have gotten back to Australia. This makes me think that I have somehow gotten on a wrong flight (in one of my many connecting flights) and have ended up somewhere in the UK instead. For whatever reason, the UK also happen to have a house exactly like mine in Australia, with the same people, and the same neighbourhood. So tomorrow I'm getting on a flight to go back to the real Australia where it's supposed to be summer, full of sunshine, mozzies and stars.

Meanwhile I decided to go on the world wide web to search for the reasons behind this above average (to put it mildly) rainfall. Some people think that it's the La Nina effect: where the air surface pressure is lower than normal in western Pacific which allows warm water to elevate to the surface. With the evaporation of this warm water, clouds form and the trade winds blow these clouds all the way over to the east coast of Australia, causing torrential downpour. La Nina is the opposite effect of El Nino which is what some people say have caused the draught for the last couple of years. Anyways, instead of reading my bullshit, you should check out wiki yourselves.

With this, I would like to ask a question, why does everything have symmetries?

Y'all Know It's Christmas!

I LOVE CHRISTMAS! It doesn't matter that my family don't celebrate it that much, all I know is that whenever Christmas comes, I'm a happy kid. I love the lights, I love the Christmas trees, I love all forms of Christmas decorations and I love most the spirit of Christmas! So spread the love, spread the joy and spread the laughter!

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL ON THIS BEAUTIFUL EARTH! MAKE IT MERRY OR ELSE!

Legend

Irish legend has it that at the end of every rainbow, there lies a pot of gold. So elusive is that pot of gold though that nonone has ever found it.

I would however, like to claim that I have found the pot of gold. The gold not in gold form but rather I found it in the form of people. For all those who have listened to me rant on and on about things, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I understand that I'm not the only one going through things so it is truly kind of you all to sit there and listen to me go on about things that you shouldn't worry about.

We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand.

If I cannot repay all your kindness, I hope to pass it on to others who need it.

I think I love leprechauns because they're so green. 

Finger

I was fortunate enough to be born with the middle finger. In fact, both middle fingers. And today I would like to make full use of them. Here's a huge fuck you with both my middle fingers. You know who you are.

I don't think I have ever felt so frustrated in my life about anything. Today everything that I needed to resolve resulted in frustration. Patience is a virtue I am slowly acquiring. For now though, all I would like to do is tell you all to go fuck yourselves. Leave me out of it.

Nope

You know when you believe a certain notion/feel a certain way but you try to convince yourself that you believe/feel otherwise?

I tried very very hard to convince myself that I'm ready to leave the US but as the end draws ever nearer, I cannot deny that deep down, I'm really not ready to leave yet.I can't believe it's been almost one year already. I feel like I've just settled in, I have barely scratched the surface of this culture, I haven't even learnt how to juggle doing a thousand things at once like everyone else yet! This whole year has been so much greater than any other years I've spent in university.

I'm going to miss a lot of things after I leave. I'm going to miss waking up 30 minutes before class and still not be late for it. I tried to tell myself that I'll go back to enjoying my 3 hour commuting time everyday but really, that just means 3 hours less of sleep. I'm going to miss walking down library walk and seeing all the stalls. I'm going to miss seeing all these random events around campus and I'm going to miss rocking up to these random events spontaneously. I'm going to miss walking around campus at the dead of the night with friends just enjoying the silence. I'm going to miss walking to Goody's at 12:30am knowing that it's still open and getting some Ben & Jerry's to eat while we watched the stupidest things online. I'm going to miss going to the gym randomly to play racket ball and table tennis. I'm going to miss the privilege of stepping out of my apartment, walking 10 steps and I'll be at a friend's apartment.

But really, what I'm going to miss the most are all the good friends I've made here. I usually don't cry (at least not in public) but when everyone left at the end of last quarter, I cried. Now it's my turn to leave. I will try not to cry but I can't say I will have more control of my tears this time around. This time, I'm gone for good. No more extending (even if I tried), no more trying to make this last longer.

I'm not saying life in Brisbane is bad, it's just that it's a completely different lifestyle here, a better lifestyle. Or let me put it this way, even though I've been away for a whole year now, I don't feel like I've missed much back home, whereas I know that I will feel like I'm missing a lot even after one quarter away from UCSD. Let's just say life here is just that much more interesting and exciting than life back home. This place is better than back home, this place is home.

Sad Panda :'(

~~~
This is also suppose to foreshadow another near future event. The inevitable event, as I'd like to call it in my mind.