I tried very very hard to convince myself that I'm ready to leave the US but as the end draws ever nearer, I cannot deny that deep down, I'm really not ready to leave yet.I can't believe it's been almost one year already. I feel like I've just settled in, I have barely scratched the surface of this culture, I haven't even learnt how to juggle doing a thousand things at once like everyone else yet! This whole year has been so much greater than any other years I've spent in university.
I'm going to miss a lot of things after I leave. I'm going to miss waking up 30 minutes before class and still not be late for it. I tried to tell myself that I'll go back to enjoying my 3 hour commuting time everyday but really, that just means 3 hours less of sleep. I'm going to miss walking down library walk and seeing all the stalls. I'm going to miss seeing all these random events around campus and I'm going to miss rocking up to these random events spontaneously. I'm going to miss walking around campus at the dead of the night with friends just enjoying the silence. I'm going to miss walking to Goody's at 12:30am knowing that it's still open and getting some Ben & Jerry's to eat while we watched the stupidest things online. I'm going to miss going to the gym randomly to play racket ball and table tennis. I'm going to miss the privilege of stepping out of my apartment, walking 10 steps and I'll be at a friend's apartment.
But really, what I'm going to miss the most are all the good friends I've made here. I usually don't cry (at least not in public) but when everyone left at the end of last quarter, I cried. Now it's my turn to leave. I will try not to cry but I can't say I will have more control of my tears this time around. This time, I'm gone for good. No more extending (even if I tried), no more trying to make this last longer.
I'm not saying life in Brisbane is bad, it's just that it's a completely different lifestyle here, a better lifestyle. Or let me put it this way, even though I've been away for a whole year now, I don't feel like I've missed much back home, whereas I know that I will feel like I'm missing a lot even after one quarter away from UCSD. Let's just say life here is just that much more interesting and exciting than life back home. This place is better than back home, this place is home.
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| Sad Panda :'( |
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This is also suppose to foreshadow another near future event. The inevitable event, as I'd like to call it in my mind.
You are the owner of your future :)
ReplyDeleteStarting a new adventure of your life doesnt imply the past will disappear.
I dont give up about skyping, but in fact I'm hiper busy. Still I have hopes that today or the following three days I'll be around ;)
kissessssss
Come back to us, Rui!! You still have to visit my house in the good ol' Real Nor Cal! You're welcome anytime, dearie!
ReplyDeleteReading this made me tear up because I really don't want you to leave either. I know it's hard for me to get to know people sometimes, but you're one person I can say I am really excited that I have! I'm going to miss you so much... I don't want you to leave!
VERY VERY VERY SAD PANDA!
=( I'm kinda sad about leaving Waterloo too(even though I came here with the mindset that everything would be temporary) and can relate to what you're feeling but at a third of the level =P
ReplyDeleteBut then, I guess we're meant to be in BNE, our HOME (until we graduate anyway hehe)and it's extremely fortunate we were able to experience going on exchange =]